Has it seriously been 11 months home for Sofie? Is my next post on her going to be the one year mark?! I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around that. It has gone by so fast, yet she seems like she has always been here. She just fits. I can’t imagine what our life would have been if we had waited to adopt. I’m thankful there was a plan bigger than us.

This has been another big month for Sofie. She is still flourishing. This month Sofie has been popping out more words and even some two syllable words. You can hear her yelling “Karkar No!” (“Parker no!” our cat) along with the rest of us 🙂 She doesn’t like speaking on command or when you ask her a question. She will use her signs then, but we frequently overhear her practicing her words.

The biggest thrill for us this month was when we saw Sofie lining up her toys while playing appropriately. I was in tears of joy. I’m getting teary just writing this. When she first came home, Sofie didn’t know how to play. She threw EVERYTHING. Banging, crashing and throwing was all she knew how to do. She slowly started exploring household items and eventually started playing with some toys appropriately. She even has her favorites now. This month, while seeming to do some imagination play with some little farm and zoo animals, she laid them and stood them in a line. This is HUGELY significant for a child who has been traumatized.

My limited understanding is that children who have experienced trauma frequently re-enact those events in their play. Throwing and crashing everything can be signs that the child is feeling chaos, tension and out of control. In Sofie’s case she banged and threw everything she could. We did see her clapping the hands of some dolls sweetly but she would also hit those dolls and bang them on things. We even witnessed some other disturbing signs of other types of abuse. When we looked at how Livi would play, she was mostly gentle with everything. She played with toys appropriately and we are always finding her toys left around the house in single file lines. These are play signs that Livi feels order and security in her world. Sofie is showing this too us through her play now too.Amazing.

We were also given a second hand doll house for the girls this month. Instead of Sofie being rough with the furniture and figurines, I watched her gently feed the dolls at the table, tuck them all in to bed and kiss them good night. She has come so far. I am just in awe of her.

She still throws and hits far more than I am at all comfortable with but she is getting there. She is learning. She is growing. She is losing her own independent survival skills and realizing we are here to take care of her with love. Did I mention she told me she loved me this month?! She copied me saying it, so it wasn’t unprompted, but it still felt pretty good to hear.

We’ve kicked up Sofie’s diet this month. She was already on a high fat diet… now she is on a super high fat diet. She is still not growing but I think we’ve finally got her up a pound this month. 27 pounds! We basically look at her plate before we give it too her and ask ourselves what we can do to add calories and fat too it. We add butter to her macaroni and cheese. She has pudding made with half whole goats milk and half whip cream each day. She even drinks half goats milk and half whip cream. I do try to give her lighter foods occasionally but we need to fatten her up to hopefully get her growing! She is still sitting at 34 inches.

Livi has developed a nickname for Sofie and calls her “Sofa” quite frequently. I didn’t think anything of it at first but now I think it is sticking. It’s been around for a few weeks. I tried explaining to Livi that a sofa is a couch, but she assured me that it “is just Sofie!”

 
It has almost been an entire year that Sofie has been home. We are so thankful for her. She amazes us everyday.

This has been an insane month and filled with more transition for Sofie. She has had so much in her short little life. She is dealing with it so much better than we could have hoped for though!

This month we moved. We packed up our home, all our earthly belongings and came to a beautiful new home. Sofie has been doing great with it. She really does seem to be taking comfort in her family rather than her surroundings. It is amazing to see. I don’t think I expected this level of attachment this quickly. Sofie is such a miracle and testament to what love and security can do for an innocent child.

She hasn’t had one night terror since moving to the new house either. We expected at least a few. Actually, I can’t remember the last night terror she has had at all! Maybe only one in the last two month! This is truly a miracle. When she first came home she was having them 4-5 times a week. They are horrible to see and there is nothing I can do to help. I’m so thankful she knows peace now. What a privilege to be a part of giving her that peace.

Sofie has been having some extra behaviors with all these transitions. She has been hitting more and been extra clingy and needing to be held but i guess that is expected. That hasn’t stopped her from developing! She is now putting two word signs together like “drink milk”, “more/all done eat”, “sorry Mommy”, and a few more that I can’t think of right now. She is also saying more words. “Drink” is the most common one. She answers yes or no questions about her preferences appropriately and has started handing me things trying to communicate that she wants me to do something with the object. Today she handed me sunglasses and did not want me to put them on her but on myself 🙂 She has also learned her aunties names and can say her own name and identify herself!… most of the time 🙂 She has come for far.

Another big thing this month is we’ve beginning to transition her to a big girl bed. We have completely child proofed her room… at least we hope we have… and took one of the rails off her crib. We put a short toddler rail up for her. The first night she fell straight to sleep! In her bed! We were not expecting that. Each night since she has fallen asleep on the floor. We are trying to get her ready for sharing a room again with Livi once baby comes. They will have bunk beds, so hopefully it will work out better than when they can see each other. We’ll see…

Yesterday Sofie had another appointment at Children’s Hospital. They are so wonderful there. We got there an hour early to see the ENT about possible sleep apnea. He got us in right away. After mentioning I wasn’t impressed with the three audiologist appointments we’d had in our home town, he got us right in to see the audiologist! Who was wonderful and got the most response out of Sofie at one of these appointments. These doctor’s listened to me. They acknowledged my concerns as valid and are pursuing non-invasive treatments first to rule out things. The home town audiologists wanted to send her for a ABR (sedated brainwave test) despite my concerns of sedation for Sofie. She has opposite reactions to it and I think she has sleep apnea. The ENT agreed that she probably has sleep apnea and wants to get a handle on that before doing any sedated testing or procedures. He, like what I’ve been trying to say to the doctors, feel that the lack of oxygen could be contributing to her lack of physical growth, among other things. I was so thankful for this affirmation from a specialist! He is going to try a nasal spray for two months to see if it is as simple as that to help the snoring and restlessness at night. I think the next step is tonsils and adenoids out.

As for her hearing, she has some mild hearing loss, possibly more in one ear rather than the other. With both ears working together, she doesn’t really seem to have much hearing loss at all. After the sleep apnea is figured out we may pursue the ABR test depending on how she is responding in her audiology appointments. The ENT did mention a possible problem with the three little bones in her ear, and hinted that that is probably the worst case scenario, but we are crossing our fingers that her hearing loss is much simpler than that.

As for her growth, she is continuing to gain and grow steadily. She could definitely do with a little more fattening up and growing taller! She is 26 pounds still and 34 1/8 inches tall. That isn’t up basically any at all in two months. A little frustrating.

For her 10 month anniversary home she got sick. Really sick. My poor baby has never had anything worse than a cold. This morning she started crying halfway through breakfast and holding her stomach. All she wanted was cuddles. I held her and she just lay on my chest. Then came the throw up. It was gross and all over me… not good for a pregnant Momma. I felt so bad for her though. She was so sad and lethargic 😦 After we got all cleaned up Sofie was just done. She just lay on my chest and fell asleep for an hour. She hasn’t fallen asleep on us since Bulgaria! I loved the cuddles but my baby was so sick 😦

This kid has an amazing imune system though because shortly after her morning nap, she bounced back! I know three other kids who have been hospitalized for dehydration because of this bug this week. Sofie ate her small lunch and kept asking for more and more dinner! Crazy kid! She was slower but played and sang and danced as usual! So much for having a “medically fragile” child 🙂 I’m sure she will defy more stereo types than just that in her life!