I had meant to write something in honor of my second Mother’s Day but I never got around to it. I’m feeling more relaxed at the moment so I thought I would give it another try and update you on my current state of Motherhood.
I never thought that I would end up being a Stay-At-Home Mom. I don’t have the personality for it. I didn’t think I would be good at it. You know the type of Mom’s who just instinctively know how to relate to children and genuinely enjoys their company; who is good at cooking and crafts and whose house is always clean. I am not that person. I never even really liked kids that much. I thought I would be bored at home. I like working outside the home and conversing with other adults. We had planned that Jon would be a Stay-At-Home Dad and I would work. Plans changed.
I’m glad to say that my ideas of me being a SAHM have dramatically changed too. I think I am a great mom and I love it. There is nothing better in life than the way your child looks at you. I love that I can give my daughter the stability and routine of being home with her. I love that I can play, teach, comfort and watch her learn on a daily basis. I love the way she lights up when I come in to the room and how she giggles at me.
I’m am truly one of the most blessed mothers in the world. I have a stable home to raise my children in, with a husband who is involved and has the same parenting style as me. During our Homestudy we were asked what we disagree on in parenting and we couldn’t think of anything… except for getting Livi’s ears pierced. I think I might have done that if Jon didn’t mind 🙂 That’s it! In two years we’ve only sort of disagreed on one thing when it comes to Livi! That is unheard of! Every once in a while my mom is struck in awe of how involved Jon is. She never had the support of a husband or father for her children. Jon puts Livi to bed nearly every night, feeds her, changes her diapers, holds her late at night if she’s had a nightmare and takes joy in family days! I don’t know what it is like to not have that support as a mother and I hope I never have to find out.
I am very thankful this Mother’s day. I am thankful for the fantastic child I have been blessed with. I am thankful for an involved, supportive, hard working husband who makes being a mother easy. I’m thankful for being able to stay at home with my daughter to give her stability and routine and not having to work outside the home. I’m thankful that being a good mom has come so naturally to me. I thought I’d have to work at it a lot harder. I’m thankful for my life not being what I expected it to be. I’m thankful for the opportunity to expand my family and the hope I have for our future.
Speaking of the future I don’t think it would be an appropriate Mother’s Day post with out updating you on my adventure in to becoming a Mom for a second time! The adoption is progressing well. Our Homestudy is finished… except for needing to hand in a two page mini-essay. Then the report will be sent to the agency office to be finalized and we have to sign it. While waiting for that I am gathering all the documents to send to Bulgaria in what is called the dossier. The dossier is basically us on paper, also called our Paper Baby 🙂
Typically, once our dossier is accepted by the country, then we begin waiting for a proposal. It happened a little backwards for us since we had had a proposal before we began our Homestudy. That was due to the fact that we are adopting a child with special needs. Since it was so early, we declined for the time being and are waiting for a proposal in the correct order now. I’m not entirely sure how long it takes for Bulgaria to accept our dossier. There are also some things changing in the Bulgarian government right now that will hopefully allow more children to be internationally adopted through a smoother, less confusing process. These changes are set to take effect in June. I doubt there are going to be many proposals before these changes take effect. I’m not expecting a proposal for a few months but it would be really nice! I am REALLY hoping for the proposal of our little girl in July or August though.
I’m ready to be a mom again… I think 🙂 I feel pregnant, in the sense that I am excited, planning, dreaming, and getting ready. I feel my heart jump when I talk about our adoption and my baby girls. I refer to my kids as “the girls” already and have begun talking to Livi about having a little sister. She looks at me like “okay, go get her now then!” I’m not a patient person so this waiting period is not the easiest on me. Hopefully this is the last Mother’s Day I celebrate as a mother of one!